HK however feels very different from Exeter because it is a small, very tight knit community. You have to really imagine yourself being in the HK family for 3 or 4 years.
Exeter's campus blew my mind. It was insane. Out of the four you listed, Exeter had the best campus. The Hotchkiss campus isn't as good as Exeter's campus.
On a side note, as for dorms, I'd go with Exeter having the nicest dorms, but Hotchkiss having the best dorm "situation." Let me explain: at Hotchkiss, there are lower-classmen dorms and upper-classmen dorms. At Exeter, all the grades are in the same dorms. I like the idea of having 9th and 10th graders better than having grades 9-12 living together. That's just me. Also, at Hotchkiss, I heard the only way you can get a double is if you request one. At Exeter, it appears most new students have a roommate. To be honest, my first year I'd prefer not to have a roommate (I want a little bit of privacy, and I'd only want to room with one of my friends).
As for the dorms themselves, Exeter had slightly better dorms from what I could see, but Hotchkiss was a close second. I was extremely impressed with Hotchkiss's dorms.
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